Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Randomize
