the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize
