don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Randomize
