Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
Randomize
