If i come over, it means nothing
Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
wat bout pragnant strippers??
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
Randomize
