I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
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