is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
Randomize
