Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Randomize
