Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
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