Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
Randomize
