He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
how do flat chested girls get laid?
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
splinters make it hard to masturbate
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Randomize
