and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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