I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
