And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
Randomize
