when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize
