Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
Randomize
