Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
Randomize
