We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
Taco trucks are like ice cream trucks for drunk adults. They should have a mariachi tune they play super loud to bring people out of the bars for tacos.
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
Ladies don't puke and tell
Randomize
