hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
Randomize
