"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Randomize
