So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
Last night: Repeatedly yelled about how the fishbowl tasted like blue, stole a stranger's hat, hugged the DJ for playing my request, made out with my roommate, and abandoned the guy I dragged to the club in the first place
This morning: Hat doesn't fit, hangover headache is blue, and I can't move without getting lightheaded
Listen when they tell you not to drink after giving blood
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
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