so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
from now on my penis is your penis
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize
