I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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