Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
Randomize
