from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
Randomize