you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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