They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Randomize