yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
