the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
Randomize