Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
In other news, I woke up still drunk and I think I literally just broke the Guinness book of world records for most bloody Mary's in one day...
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
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