are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
Still dying that you shit outside
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
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