Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
... I threw up in the shower this morning
You were "I'm not drunk" drunk.
I was feeling sad so bedroom vodka seemed like the best solution at the time.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
Randomize
