I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
3pm strippers are depressing
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
Randomize
