What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
Randomize
