So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
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