i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
