You're my little dorito
Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
Randomize