if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
Randomize