What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
too bad you live with your parents still
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Randomize
