Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
