It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Randomize
