love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize
