u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
Randomize
