I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
Randomize
