I heard we made out
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
Randomize