we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
that may or may not have been my penis.
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