More tranny stories later!
why are there goldfish crackers all over my bed?
you decided you wanted to name them & keep them as pets.
Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
I just added a bunch of arbitrary options to my ouija board. Ghosts can now tell me "cheddar," "the homosexual agenda," "the whole foods vegan aisle," or "viable offspring"
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
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