She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
is this the sara with the beer cane?
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
Randomize
