We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
