I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
Randomize
