i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
Randomize